Well it's all over. Basically he didn't want to give me much in settlement. If he could have got away with paying nothing he would have done.
The second judge we saw told him that he had better get his act together and sort his accounts out. Totally different to the first judge. It has taken years for him to do his accounts. This has caused most of the delays in this case. There is no point trying to come to a settlement without financial details. He was holding up everything. He did ont comply with one court order to produce!! He eventually got his accounts done and submitted. He said he was drawing a little salary of c£7500. This wouldn't even pay the mortgage for 6 months!!!
Since separation he hasn't paid a penny to me for child support. Going to the CSA could have been avoided if he had bothered to pay anything. I guess his new family is more important. R already feels rejected by his family and this just compounds it further.
The CSA assessed him as having to pay £40/week for R and half care of H before her accident. This is the minimum to pay for someone working (I think). Eventually he ran up debts of £7300. He sent accounts to CSA eventually and was reassessed as having to pay £6/week, then £15/week. I asked for a variation because his lifestyle is inconsistent with his income. His accounts show that he pays himself £25-35k of dividends.
The day before the final court hearing he got a phone call from CSA and he was informed that his debt was now £9500 and he has to pay c£400/month until R is 19 and/or out of college. Needless to say he isn't happy about that!!
Him and I had plenty of texts and emails trying to reach some sort of settlement prior to going to court. It would be cheaper and hopefully less acrimonious. I told him what I expected and we negotiated. He has managed to get a re-mortgage on the house. Goodness knows how!! Apparently it was on a drive-by valuation, which put the house at £250k, far more than the £175k that several agents have valued it at!! Not my problem.
In court the solicitors got together to bash out the final details before we before the judge. She was happy with what we had agreed, with a few minor adjustments. We signed a draft copy which will now be drawn up and signed. My solicitor will apply for the decree absolute and then the consent order is in force.
So I can actually say that he is an ex. And quite ironic I suppose that I changed my relationship status on what would have been our 22nd anniversary!! He had changed his several days before to be "in an open relationship" with the tart. This leaves him open to shagging other people I suppose.
He put it on Facebook that he apparently regards me as a cancerous growth that he's had removed!! And he replied to one person that "if you only knew the artificial bullshit that we have been through with lack of cooperation and crap just to put my legal fees up - not to mention lies to the csa to extract more state sponsored terrorism - then you may well understand - it's not good but I got home from court to little x opening the door and shouting "My Daddy" - kind of sums it up for me really"
